For some reason, people feel inclined to put in their two cents when they see a pregnant lady. Any other non-pregnant day, you could go through life with strangers looking down in the event of unexpected, awkward eye contact. But insert a baby bump and BOOM, you are fair game for open discussion and personal opinions from everyone you’ve ever known or come in contact with. As a pregnant lady myself, here’s our real take on the comments heaved our way:
You’re glowing – Well actually, I’m not. I’m sweating like a pig because I’ve tacked on an extra 30+ lbs and my body temperature has risen to the point where I can bake cinnamon buns to perfection in 10 minutes.
You’re nesting – The second you become pregnant, anytime you mention cleaning or organizing, people attribute it to nesting. Magical fairies do not clean toilets and scrub floors while you are pregnant, so those tasks still need to be done. A growing fetus is not controlling your brain and compelling you to do so…it’s more like your other child’s after dinner ketchup splatter murder scene or your husbands post lawn mowing sweaty clothes pile that demand an arsenal of cleaning products. Nope, no nesting here people, just life!
You must be having cravings – What human doesn’t want icecream in the middle of August? Sure, I’ll tell whomever that it’s a craving so they run out and get me icecream and I can stay in a cool air conditioned house, or so I can decide between pizza or Chinese for the night, but yet again my friends, no cravings, just the working of having taste buds and a normal human stomach.
Aww, you look so cute – Ok, maybe sometimes, in some lighting, with great makeup and a blow out, you can appear to be cute – from time-to-time. But for the most part, pregnant women are waddling, have a face on like they smell something rotten, and have patches of leg hair they either can’t reach or haven’t seen in weeks in order to address the situation – so without the flattering Instagram filters and camera angels, cute is the last thing we feel.
Get your sleep now – Oh, you don’t say? Please explain how to accomplish that between the heartburn, sleep apnea, back aches, baby hiccups and kicks, numerous bathroom trips without having the ability to drink a bottle of wine to the face or eat a box of Benadryl.
You look like you’re carrying a ____ – Thanks for the input Dr., but really, what you’re telling me is that if my butt is wide you think I’m carrying a girl, and if my stomach looks uncomfortably large or low, you think there’s a boy in there. It’s like telling a woman who’s getting ready to go out that her outfit makes her look fat but she should just go out and have fun anyway.
There are certain things in this world that we can guarantee – like your child always needing to use the bathroom as soon as your food is delivered to your table, or better yet, waking you up in the middle of the night when you decide to have that one extra glass of wine. Add these comments to the list of things to expect when expecting because you most certainly will hear them time and again the next time you host a human in your uterus for 40 weeks!